Today is my first day at work after being on maternity leave. I usually like starts in life. This "re"-start is different. It brings a certain melancholy with it. I am not who I used to be 2 months ago. Now I worry, I care, I check and re-check, I obsess, I despair as strongly as I hope and pray, I yearn.
A little person, all 14 pounds and 24 inches of him, has changed me. He started changing me about 11 months ago but since his actual birth, he's really made me a different person.
Wonder what it is that despite having known this person for so short a time, I cannot seem to get him off my mind. Poets wax poetic about love. I know love. This is different - it is beyond that.
Today's cloudy-dusted dawn brought with it some stolen cuddles, last minute flying kisses and a tear-blurred ride in the elevator down my apartment building and then up to the 20th floor of my office building. The 10 minute walk in the middle - I have no recollection on. A father was dropping off his toddler in front of a local daycare. As I walked by, he adjusted her hat and she looked up at me and smiled.
This will get easier. I will learn to like it. I will miss him less. I tell myself.
A little person, all 14 pounds and 24 inches of him, has changed me. He started changing me about 11 months ago but since his actual birth, he's really made me a different person.
Wonder what it is that despite having known this person for so short a time, I cannot seem to get him off my mind. Poets wax poetic about love. I know love. This is different - it is beyond that.
Today's cloudy-dusted dawn brought with it some stolen cuddles, last minute flying kisses and a tear-blurred ride in the elevator down my apartment building and then up to the 20th floor of my office building. The 10 minute walk in the middle - I have no recollection on. A father was dropping off his toddler in front of a local daycare. As I walked by, he adjusted her hat and she looked up at me and smiled.
This will get easier. I will learn to like it. I will miss him less. I tell myself.
